Thursday, April 28, 2005

If I Was an Astronaut...

...I'd probably get space sick too.

Jonathan Last punished me with this tag. The goal is to pick 5 jobs from the list and what you would do with them, so here goes:

If I could be a...

scientist, I would be the third Mythbuster, and would likely up that show's insurance premium bigtime.

missionary, I would teach Americans of the love and saving power of Jesus Christ. Ok, so I decided to be serious on this one.

linguist, I would translate a tedious negotiation at the U.N. into Klingon, leaving the ambassadors to discuss the finer points of Shakespeare in that alien tongue.

architect, I would design a home for my wife, housekeeper, and 6 kids that had more than two bedrooms between the children and more than a single bathroom shared by all 6 of them. I would also take better care of the dog such that he could return for season 2.

proctologist, (couldn't resist) I'd purchase latex gloves by the pallet, candles and deodorizers, and I'd be washing my hands lots and lots. And I would certainly NOT make any reference to my job with a vanity license plate. And somehow potty humor would become shop talk.

Here's the complete list to choose from:
If I could be a scientist...
If I could be a farmer...
If I could be a musician...
If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter...
If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary...
If I could be a chef...
If I could be an architect...
If I could be a linguist...
If I could be a psychologist...
If I could be a librarian...
If I could be an athlete...
If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an innkeeper...
If I could be a professor...
If I could be a writer...
If I could be a backup dancer...
If I could be a llama-rider...
If I could be a bonnie pirate...
If I could be a midget stripper...
If I could be a proctologist...

My victims are The Soxblogger and return the favor (sort of) to Vic Matus.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home